We've met twice, families are pushing, but he just nods. How do I know if he's actually interested?

You need to create an opportunity to speak with him directly and privately. It is difficult to gauge genuine interest when conversations are only in formal family settings. Consider asking him for a brief, one-on-one call or a separate meeting where you can express your need for clarity. You could say something like, "Our families are discussing a big decision, and I would really appreciate hearing your thoughts directly on this proposal. Are you comfortable with moving forward, or do you have any reservations?" Being this direct might feel unusual, and it could even be seen as forward, but the cost of not knowing his true feelings before commitment is far greater. A genuinely quiet person can still articulate their thoughts and feelings when given a direct opportunity. If he continues to only smile and nod, even when you directly ask about his comfort or specific aspects of the match, that response itself is significant information. Marriage, especially within a joint household, requires a partner who can communicate their needs, concerns, and desires, even if they are naturally reserved. Understanding his capacity for open communication now is crucial. Your decision needs to be based on a clear understanding of your potential partner, and open communication is a foundational aspect of any marriage.