How many times should we meet before deciding?
TrueSoulMatch Editorial
Both families want an answer and we have met twice. I do not feel like I know him well enough to decide something this big, but I also cannot keep saying let us meet again without it looking like I am not interested.
1 answer
TrueSoulMatch Editorial
It is perfectly reasonable to need more than two meetings to decide on something as significant as a lifelong partnership. You can take control of the timeline by suggesting a specific number of additional meetings and a timeframe. For instance, you could communicate, "I would like to meet one or two more times, ideally within the next week or two, to feel confident in my decision." This sets clear expectations without endless stalling. Each additional meeting offers less about uncovering hidden traits and more about observing consistency and natural interaction. You're not looking for a secret answer, but for how they handle casual conversation, small decisions, or a minor disagreement. Do they listen? Are they respectful? Do you feel a natural flow or constant effort? These observations help you gauge compatibility in everyday life, which is crucial for a joint household. It is vital to communicate directly with the other person about your pace. You can say something like, "I'm still getting to know you and appreciate these meetings. I'd like a couple more before making such a big commitment." This shows interest while asserting your need for clarity. Sometimes, one family might push harder for a quick decision, perhaps hinting that delays signal disinterest or create an impression of being difficult. The family pushing for a quick 'yes' might be the prospective groom's, or it could just as easily be the prospective bride's, creating pressure for their son to decide. The underlying dynamic of being rushed remains the same. Asking for more time can feel like you are creating an obstacle, especially with family expectations. However, making an ill-informed decision out of politeness or pressure carries a far greater cost. Prioritise your peace of mind and the foundation of your future.